Shoe Fetish

You've got to understand the fact that my sister is quite possibly one of the coolest people on the planet. She's got flawless taste in clothes and decorating, is crazy smart, a fabulous artist, and even a good manager of her money. All of these things are things that I lack, and therefore, admire. She's kind to just about everyone, but completely no-nonsense if the need arises. Although she's never quite stern enough with her art students....sometimes I have to get in there and make them behave. They always seemed afraid of me. Am I that scary? Don't answer that. In any case, Shelby is absolutely amazing and I'd lay down my life for her without hesitation. However, she's also completely freaking hilarious when it comes to how she categorizes things. For one thing, she has a shoe fetish. She's completely and totally one hundred percent addicted to shoes in all their forms. Wedges, heels, flats, boots, espadrilles, stilettos....if it had a hard sole and you can walk in it, she knows it and loves it. As long as it's fashionable, of course. One time, we were out shopping, and she was squealing and ooohing and ahhhing over some brown shoes. My mother, wise and thrifty as she is, reminded my sister of the fact that she already had a pair of brown heels. Then Shelby, with completely sincere seriousness, replied with an "aren't you dumb" tone of voice that she already had a pair of light brown shoes and some medium brown shoes. These were DARK brown shoes, and therefore, essential to her existence. It isn't possible NOT to love my sister.