Where No Man Has Gone Before....at least none that I want to know...

Captain's log, Stardate 10052007. Today the USS POS, my own personal intergalactic investigative vehicle, went into the unknown world of the 21st century mall. I was accompanied by my faithful and much appreciated first officer, Commander Rachel. We made contact successfully with the local natives on the Planet Wolfchase, and then continued forth on our urgently important mission on that strange world. I noted that instead of there being a common or traditional pattern of dress and attitude, the planet's young acted and looked as different from one another as a Vulcan and a Klingon. Still and all, the Commander and I decided to follow a native custom, in the hopes of maintaining a good relationship with that strange culture. So we went to the popular teen hangout, called "Claire's" where we underwent the slightly painful ritual of having earrings put into our earlobes. It was a strange effect, but undeniably appealing. Feeling thus fortified for any occurrence that might come our way, we ventured back out into the strange Planet Wolfchase and traveled around its entire circumference, taking in the sights and trying on native garments. We were even two of the first people to visit the unexplored region call "Sephora." Eventually, after the captain had spent her entire allowance for the month on strange and beautiful artifacts, the Commander and I reboarded the USS POS and continued on our way, back into the Great Unknown, with a successful mission safely under our belts. Due to her excellent performance on this mission, I now wish to promote Commander Rachel to the rank of Captain, as I am taking the rank of Admiral and will be leaving the USS POS behind, in order to become the admiral of the much newer and undoubtedly better space vehicle, the USS Firebird. Much better name, too. Live long and prosper!