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Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Funerary Arrangements

This honored website regrets to inform you all of the death of Katie's back. It was killed last night when she, in a fit of actually trying to take care of herself, decided to exercise. In the process of this highly noble ambition, she managed to throw it out somehow. The poor back has been buried in her bed, wrapped in the loving embrace of a heating pad. The rest of Katie's body mourns this honored and most beloved comrade, and her spine in particular just doesn't know how to stand up without it. All those who wish to honor Katie's back and the wonderful job it did during Life may either send flowers or leave an epitaph here. Farewell, beloved back. We will miss you always. Life is just a pain without you.

5 comments:

oc said...

(in the same vein as your post)Remember Lazarus...


This sickness is not unto death...

Your back shall rise again.

Keep the faith, my friend. :)
oc

firebirdsinger said...

*solemn bow* Thank you ever so kindly, brave man, for your encouraging comment. Someday, her back will return amongst the clouds....
Is that sacreligious? *makes apology to God, just in case*

Halcyon said...

A Eulogy for said Back:

"Knick knack, Katie's back
Cracked along the bone.
Why did it fail her
When she rose alone
To take care all the other
Parts of herself?
It took her feet from under her
And now she's on the shelf.

"Knick Knack, Katie's back
Is a jealous bone.
Why did it fail her?
Does it want to be alone?
Is it jealous of her
And her attempts to care
For the rest of her body
From her toes to her hair?

"Knick Knack, Katie's back,
Lies like a stone
In the grave of her room.
Her bed is its throne.
Surrounded on all sides
By Irish and Tolkish fare.
Katie, next time
With your back take more care!"

-with deepest sympathies,
Jon Vowell

firebirdsinger said...

*bursts into laughter*
Nice, Jon. You get double kudos.

Anonymous said...

It's because you spend all your time sitting at your computer writing these blog posts! j/k :)