Provoke Not A Dedicated CSI Fan to Wrath, For You Are Crunchy and Good With Ketchup

If you ever want to laugh so hard you're about to puke, recreate the events I'm about to describe to you. My family, having a rare family moment, was watching CSI together. Grissom had proposed to Sara, she had said yes, all was going well with our world....until....the dumb weather channel broke in when it was THREE FREAKING MINUTES away from being done. Needless to say, much angst, shouting, and cursing of all meteorologists went on, while my mother, the brave little retailer, burst into the action. Grabbing the telephone, she proceeded to have a reasonable facsimile of this conversation: "News Channel 3, how may we help you?" "Could you not wait three minutes until CSI was over to break in? Why did you do that? It wasn't necessary!" "Ma'am, calm down. There was a tornado warning for Mississippi." "Well, guess what-I don't live in Mississippi!" "It's not all about you, ma'am." "Well, I want to know when you're going to be replaying that episode! That was just rude!" "Good night." "Is it?" Both parties hang up. My mother rocks, end of story. At this very moment, she's e-mailing a furious diatribe to the forenamed station's e-mail address, and talking with her friends in a furious tone of voice. Ah. I needed a laugh. Blessings, and don't drink contaminated water! You'll end up like Grissom's carp!