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Thursday, October 18, 2007

God Power

Self-help. Self-esteem. Self-pity. Self-absorbed. Selfish. Self-worth. Our culture is hopelessly mired in the self, in the me me me. Yet, often a lot of us have a self-esteem roughly equivalent to that of a goldfish. A lot of people only see their flaws, and continually wish to be something more, something special, something distinct from the rest of the world. "If only I were prettier." "If only I were smarter." "If only I were thinner..." The list is endless. Girls especially are prone to the trap of demeaning themselves. So we listen to inspiring "girl power" music, we look for ways to make ourselves more beautiful, and we tell ourselves repeatedly that it doesn't matter how other people see us. It matters how we see ourselves. Be true to yourself. Everyone is beautiful in their own ways. But eventually, even that healthy image falls short of our own expectations. Where does the cycle end? Usually in depression, despair, and failed goals and dreams. I'm not unique in this; I suffer from probably the lowest self-esteem yet seen on the planet since Leah had to use her son in order to hang out with Jacob-she only had pretty eyes. Yet, after a visit with one of my good friends, I'm left pondering this whole business of how we as humans view ourselves. I know that I long for people to look past my appearance and see who I truly am-I'm someone who's just trying to be the best handmaiden for God that I can. Being a handmaiden is important to me-almost all of the women in the Bible I admire called themselves handmaidens. Hannah, Mary, Elizabeth....so many special women that were willing to serve God without shame, no matter what the cost. I know that I want people to view me positively-instead of being that girl with some extra poundage and pimples, I want to be the girl that loves to write, and loves her family and friends without hesitation. But see-even that desire isn't important. Because here's the rub: God made me acne prone. God didn't make me to be Liv Tyler. He made me to be me, and only me, and unashamedly me. So self-esteem shouldn't really matter that much. As long as I try to be the woman God made me, how I view myself isn't really important. How He views me is. As one of my favorite comedians says, "When the creator of matter says that you matter, then you will have self-esteem." Stop viewing yourself through the world's eyes, and try to see yourself as God sees you. Yes, you have flaws. Yes, you still have work to do. But it's a long journey, and it's not over. God isn't done with you yet, and He isn't going to desert you. So throw away that self-help book, and try to remember that when you're bemoaning those extra pounds, that God loves you no matter how you look or feel. It's your actions that truly count.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Katie, You are beautiful, inside and out. God has great plans for you because he went to a lot of trouble to make you so talented and loving and to place you in a family that loves you so much. If you are reading this, I'm here to tell you something: I've lived with Katie for 20+ years and she is one in a million.

oc said...

Katie,
You are a doll.

Just sayin'.
oc.

gmommy said...

Katie,
You blessed this self absorbed lady tonight...thank you honey for cutting thru the counterfeit to the real deal.
I'm still learning!!!!!
:)